Defintely Nature, not Nurture

[Quixote]

I hate the word normal with a violent passion.  I had bad experiences with it in my youth.

Putting that aside I do know that as a very small child there was some adverse comment among mothers of little girls I knew.  I enjoyed playing "Doctor" a little too often, with pretty much every girl in the town where I grew up.

Start as you mean to go on, I suppose.  :)

[Sprayman]

Couldn't agree more there Quix. I did it too, and it was even less 'normal' in the years I was growing up in. I was a pariah before I could spell it, let alone knew what it meant!

[Latent Slave]

Agreed on the normal/abnormal thing. Hence the quotes on "abnormal". I hate labels and categories too for the most part. No one ever nicely fits into one, know what I mean?

[Sprayman]

Know exactly what you mean. I really don't fit into anyone categories very well, and I kind of like it that way. I'm a sadist - but I'm happy to be one! Screw everything else!

[Quixote]

I was lucky that my mother thought it was normal, and a good sign of a healthy kid.  Thank God for hippy parents.

On labels, I used to enjoy calling myself a libertine.  Now the Libertines, a relatively uninteresting band, have taken that word from me ...

[Sprayman]

I was lucky that my mother thought it was normal, and a good sign of a healthy kid.  Thank God for hippy parents.

On labels, I used to enjoy calling myself a libertine.  Now the Libertines, a relatively uninteresting band, have taken that word from me ...

Perhaps you should evolve your own name/category!

[Quixote]

I'll give that some thought ...

[tak17]

Very interesting to see some of the posts here. I was also a frequent masturbater as a child. (Once got caught by my grandma - a very religious woman - yikes!) But seriously, before I had any idea how sex actually worked, I had fantasies of being spanked by powerful men. Not just average spankings either, quite vicious. As vicious as my young mind could dredge up. Then, as I grew and learned more, my fantasies matured. Imagine my delight when I figured out that there are sadistic men out there that would love to overpower, hurt and rape me! Now, I just have to find one! LOL

[Emma]

In all Seriousness..have you ever been to a munch?   There is likely a very big community of kinky folks in your area.  Are you familiar with the term 'munch'?  private message me or Alebeard, or Sprayman for some basic info if you want.  We  Alebeard and I) live in Portland and are involved in the local BDSM community as well as going over  into Vancouver WA and attending some really fun events.   I am totally enamored with the kink community and have found the most amazing friends who are so very in touch with them selves, their fantasies etc....  its been life changing.   Dreams really do come true...more than you can imagine.  *sappy grin*

[Quixote]

I've still never been to a munch.  I keep meaning to get around to it.  It isn't like London doesn't have plenty.

I just never seem to have that much trouble finding perverted girls.

I don't even hunt in goth clubs anymore.  :)

[Emma]

It is where i met my first bunch of real life perverts.. the good kind that is..  Well, actually it was in a BDSM chat room where I met Ale then onto the BDSM social stuff.   Its such a nice safe way to find out about your community and the choices you have.   

[Quixote]

I love it when you go all after school special.  :)

You are, as ever, quite right.

[Mist]

Old thread I realise, but just thought I'd throw in my two cents.

I believe that you're either born gay, bi, straight and anything inbetween.  Some people may not know it or deny it to themselves, but I don't believe one's sexuality is a choice.  (I'm bi, only in the past year or so have I fully accepted myself - strangly enough, I was more comfortable being a sadist than bisexual, now I enjoy being both *grin*)

As for sadism...  Like others, I would often fantasize about women being hurt, and would masturbate to these thoughts, even though at the time (I must have been about 8 or 9) I didn't know what I was doing.  Even as a child, playing with playmobile & GI Joe's, things would always get violent, and the GI Joe would always torture and rape his captive.  Again, I must have been about 7 or 8 at the time.  I knew this wasn't 'normal' (like the others said, what is normal?), so I hid what I did.

As a teenager I was sexually abused, but I don't believe that has anything to do with my sadism or sexuality, as I was aware of both a long time before the abuse started.  Before that, my childhood had been a happy one - middle class, two loving parents etc.

So for me, I would have to say that it's nature, rather than nurture.  Something else which makes me belief this is the fact that my cousin is also a sadist.  We had completely different childhoods and upbringings, but we've both turned out to be sadists.  A nice family trait to share ;-)